Done!

Finished Duty and the Beast, yay yay yay!

I mean, it hasn't even been spellchecked, let alone edited (I have the feeling there's waaay too much plot), but it's done, last word written, and I actually really like the ending. So, yay me!

I feel justified in going off to Newmarket tomorrow and spending all my ill-gotten (read: given to me by my nannan) gains.

Talk to you when I've made a killing at the races. Or when I've come back from Cornwall. Depends on how much I have to drink tomorrow.

Holdin' out for a hero

Some time ago, I blogged about writing patterns, and how we tend to write stories with common elements. Having watched a bit of Daisy Thingummy's Reader, I Married Him on TV, I've been wondering if patterns don't just apply to one writer, but to the whole genre of romance. You know, those archetypes that are supposed to be typified by the Star Wars characters? Since a) I never took the Media Studies class where this was explained and b) I never watched Star Wars (so sue me. Watch Firefly, it's way better), I'm a little shaky on them, but it's along the lines of Hero, Mentor, Ally, etc. You know the score. If you've ever read a romance, you can probably identify the character types in it.

Anyway. Apparently the next episode of Reader... is about heroes (it's already played, but I haven't seen it yet, stupid programming clashes, wait until the repeat on Sunday) and what elements can be found in them. But my spies tell me that dear Daisy focuses mostly on Misters Darcy and Rochester, Heathcliff and Rhett Butler (and only the film version of Rhett, anyway). What do these have in common? Well, the youungest of them is Rhett, who was published seventy years ago. Pride and Prejudice, I think was written in the 1790s. They're not what you might call the most modern of heroes.

And yet they're enduring. Why? Why do romantic novelists still continue to write haughty millionaires, or brooding liars, or snarling beasts, or charming snakes? What's attractive about any of those? I'll confess to not having read Jane Eyre or Wuthering Heights (I watched about twenty minutes of a film of WH and loathed every gloomy second of it), but I'm familiar with P&P and GWTW. Read it about four times a year when I was a teenager.

If a man said you were 'not handsome enough to tempt [him]' and listed the reasons why you weren't good enough for him, would you give him the time of day? Well, no, and you'd be right not to. As was Lizzie in P&P--she continued to dislike Darcy until he both explained and redeemed himself. I can't imagine that Christmas Dinner would be all that much fun in the Bennet household--Mrs B chattering on incessantly, Lydia flaunting her idiocy at every second, Darcy suffering it all in silence and trying to be civil to, or ignore, Wickham. In fact, I'd imagine he'd stick to Bingham and Jane and Lizzie and try to block out the rest. Ahhh, domestic harmony. But anyway, Darcy did prove to be a more worthy man, warm and caring towards his sister, an entertaining host to Lizzie's aunt and uncle, and doggedly rescuing Lizzie's most silly sister, when really she didn't deserve it. So Lizzie realises, as we do, that Darcy's worthy of her admiration, friendship, and love.

Rhett's an entirely different animal. Charming, outgoing, adventurous and not above a little lawlessness, he's the complete opposite of Darcy. He doesn't win Scarlett's affection by sticking to protocol, and neither does he try to redeem himself for her. In fact, the harder Rhett tries to redeem himself, the less interested Scarlett is in him. It's only when he sticks two fingers up at her that she remembers why she liked him in the first place. Rhett's a bad boy--and if you stuck him down in the middle of P&P, he'd have entertained Mr and Mrs B, charmed the sisters to within an inch of their lives, and beaten Wickham to within an inch of his. He'd also have laughed until he cried at Darcy's stiff upper lip.

That's why I like Rhett so much more than Darcy...but why has Darcy remained the more enduring hero template? Why are romances full of misunderstandings, misrepresentations, haughty men and proud women? Why doesn't anyone just say what they feel, like Rhett? Is it because of the unhappy ending in GWTW? Well, I don't think so. What's the last thing Scarlett says? "Tomorrow is another day." Now she's finally realised she doesn't want silly Ashley, she wants Rhett--and she sees that all this time, Rhett's been there for her. Who cheered her up when she discovered Ashley was marrying Melly? Who danced with her at the fund-raising ball? Who took care of Melly and rescued them from Atlanta? Who married her when she was poor and miserable--and gave her everything she wanted? Rhett loves her. He never gives up on her. He sees her silliness, her immaturity, her selfishness--but he also sees her strength, her determination, her passion, and he loves all those qualities the same.

It's not over between Rhett and Scarlett when GWTW ends. He's mad with her, and she's upset with him; but she's not the sort of girl to sit down and cry when she loses what she wants, and he's not the sort of man to give up when someone says 'no'.

Just like Darcy wasn't the sort of man to give up on Lizzie when she shot him down in flames. He was an ass, and she called him on it. Just like Scarlett tells Rhett about all his faults. Repeatedly. So Darcy, chagrined, displays his dependability and loyalty to Lizzie by going after silly Lydia. Rhett, for all his catting about, also comes through for Scarlett when she needs him, finding the means to rescue not only her from the wreck of Atlanta, but her very fragile friend who's just given birth. Believing Lizzie can't stand him, Darcy still never gives up his feelings for her--and neither does Rhett.

I'd call that a pattern, wouldn't you? Maybe a gunrunner and a haughty aristocrat don't have much relevancy in modern romance--but the way they behave towards their heroines does. So we continue to read and write about loveable rogues and arrogant millionaires. Just flicking through my mental Rolodex, I can tell you that I've written a couple of Darcys (Tadgh in Baby Sham Faery Love for one, Dark in Almost Human for another), and plenty of Rhetts (most notably Ceyx in Playing with Matches, and Striker in Almost Human). From that, you can probably infer that I prefer the Rhetts of this world--or maybe, out of this world...

Who can tell me other Rhetts and Darcys in modern fiction? Which do you prefer?

Inspirations

There's a character in Terry Pratchett's Wyrd sisters who is so struck by inspiration that he tries to invent a helmet to stop the ideas flooding into his head. Sometimes I'd like one of those. Sometimes not.

I was having a very lucid dream last night, but damned if I can remember much of it. There were marks, the marks of some cult, and a thing that read them and told me about secrets in my past, and someone evil who was out to exploit me for these marks. Weird. But, you know what? It sounds like a story to me.

What Do You Mean, I'm Too Tall For This Skirt?

I LOVE this video. I LOVE this song. I LOVE Neil Finn. I'd love YouTube if they'd let me post the frickin' thing to my blog, but as usual, somthing somewhere isn't working, so you'll just have to follow the link. ("We are fetching your blog information." No, you're not, you've been saying that for twenty minutes. It doesn't take that long, even with my modem).

Look out for the wedding cake at the end. Isn't that just adorable? Also, listen for the chord in the chorus--not the first time around, he makes you wait--where he sings "Somehow I will still believe her." It's THE most gorgeous thing I've ever heard. Play on... that strain again, it had a dying fall.

Reader, I married him.

Article in today's News Review by Daisy Goodwin on her 'heroine addiction', tying in with her new series, Reader, I married him (BBC4, 9pm tomorrow if you're interested), about romantic fiction. A lot of romance writers I know are on tenterhooks waiting to see how cruel or kind she is in the series. If the article is anything to go by, I don't think they have anything to worry about.

There are, of course, always a few people who pick on a small point and wail about it until someone takes notice, mostly I think because they like the sound of their own voice. In this case, I expect it will be the line "romantic fiction is quite rightly written to a formula."** But I don't care about them, and I don't expect they give a damn about me either.

Like most women who read romantic fiction, I am only too painfully aware that fiction is precisely what it is, but I can carry my disbelief alongside my innermost conviction that living happily ever after is not just for fairytales...Women need the grown-up fairy stories of romantic fiction in order to make the random cruelty of everyday life bearable. And before men sneer at women who read romances, they should ask exactly why they need to read a book about the siege of Stalingrad or the SAS. Do they perhaps find facts less threatening than stories that deal with emotion?

Hah! Well said.

Some bits of the article are a little confusing--at the end she says if she had a son she'd make him read romance novels so he'd better understand women, and then in the same paragraph says she's glad men don't read those books, because now our secrets are safe. What? That doesn't really make sense.

On another note, today is my half-birthday. That is, exactly six months today it will be my actual birthday. Time was, I'd get presents and a card--yes yes, I know, spoilt much? I'd say I was canny. My brother got a half-birthday, so of course I made sure I did. Of course, he got his because his birthday is Christmas Day, and he often lost out on celebrations and presents (FYI, if you know anyone with a birthday on that day, don't give then a joint present. I don't care whether you're spending the same amount as you would on two. They want something to unwrap. However old they are).

Of course, now I's a grown-up, I don't get a half-birthday any more. But there is an apple-pie in the oven waiting for me. I had to make it, but whaddya gonna do?


**Well, come on. Man plus woman (or man plus man, whatever floats your boat) times conflict plus black moment divided by resolution equals happy ending. Whine all you like, it is a formula. You try writing a category romance without one, and see how many rejection letters you get.

Zucchero, il modello

Okay, that's probably not the right Italian, but I can't find my dictionary. Richard and I are learning Italian, you see. I did some at school, but it was ten years ago and I hardly remember any. See? School is useless.

Anyway. During the 'caffe con zucchero' bit of the CD (yes, CD, and it has backing music, too!), little Sugar trotted in. Well, I say little. She's pretty big now. Not as big as her brother, who is heavier than me now. But then, since I only weigh seven stone three, that's not hard.

(er, that's 7st3 per ...eye).

But my bella Zucchero is so pretty, I took some pictures of her, lounging on my new duvet like the little superstar she is. Ain't she gorgeous? Ain't my bedding cool? Ain't it all bellissimo?

Procrastination station

So, okay. Next Sundown book should be turned in by the end of the month. Samhain Christmas story the month after that. Then the next-next Sundown book. Then I have to finish self-edits on Sophie book three. And finish writing Kett's book. Then edit Sophie books four, five and six. Then finish book seven, and write book eight.

But you know what I'm doing? Making Poser arts.

Whatcha all doin' to procrastinate?

Approximately Human

They used to have this column in the Times Magazine on Saturdays where a famous saying, speech or whatever, would be put through an online translator into some other language, then back into English. Honestly, it was like reading those t-shirts printed up in Japan.

So in the spirit of learning and entertainment (trans: it's bloody funny and I love to procrastinate), I'm going to do the same with a couple of my book blurbs. You can tell where the translator just stalled over certain phrases (because they're the ones which are untouched). Greek was fun: all those funky characters!


She Who Dares, to Greek and back (couldn't find an Egyptian translator, but Dare is Greek, so that'll do).
There are nights when does I serious wish I'd never rise from the grave.

Undead executioner they are One thing , but when does the Guy I'm provision to kill turn Outside To have the blue eyes and yummiest butt I've seen since the fall of the Greek empire ( which incidentally was the last time saw him ), I start To have second thoughts.

He nice himself to dare , and that's it not as soon as his incomparable hotness that's all stalling me. twenty three century before my sign existent in the pharaoh and my heart upon One soldier. both of the them betrayed me. this was sole to dare who tried upon to rescue me.

This who to dare

Because serious , who sleep means One coffee this days?


What Wizards Want, to Welsh and back (see above re: no Irish translator, but Welsh came from the same root, and is also a seldom-used second official language. Plus, ain't much sea between them).

Five y were penetrating You Never Knew About Wizards

1. You wave ' tower need he is being able tea proper crusts mantle - type props he may cover I come real bags. Although y were penetrating flour get kind smith interesting when you improvise.

2. You would clarify below no wizard full smith jolly hyme and spills. You get pushed to to tea deep end and only tea really lucky honest get I go let him become night plug.

3. Like wizards. Tea same way hey were depressing humans like pack she-mull except web ' stud way kinder he may cover pack she-mull.

4. Web ' stud dot immune he may cover I go shapely female form although sadly , dot ace available ace I ' heartburn like.

5. Sometimes — just sometimes — web get y were penetrating wron. And when web I come , tea results flour be spectacular.

How e pirate queens have you freed lately?


Elf Gratification, to Swedish and back:

Calascien keeper perceive Truly reindeer isn't too happy to hear that his boss ice about to pray replaced. Ago keep one's cool thing he peer the old Truly. Ago another the new Truly ice the silliest , sexy , aunt annoyance young blonde he's ever met. How's an elf supporter to concentrate when his boss keeps dressing invite peer Truly A bit Stripped?

Candy Cinnamon isn't particularly pleased to pray abducted pious her life as a Hollywood husband artist duck tip in the noon perceive Nowhere Lapland. Ago a take-off everyone seems to pray really stoned : truly Elves? What are they smoking? Then there's the guy assigned to keep an eye on her : the aunt arrogant annoying deluded husband there's ever been.

But if he could fair goat it into his head that he's note an elf duck she's note Truly then she might take-off to find him gentle attractive. In a lunatic kind perceive way.


Fun, huh? Okay, one more. Almost Human...now, what language to pick? I know, Tagalog!


Bell journal. me are chance , knight of the order of the Phoenix , woman of the association.

Me trainer as a Phoenix knight because I'm condemn beneficial in a fight. me trainer as an associate because I'm condemn beneficial in bed. but all the training in the monarchy couldn't prepare me for dark man so potent sexy me can't keep my underwear toward in its presence.

It's a shame , then , thatch dark seem toward have different plan for my body—for sample , kill it.

Approximately Human

Love possible possible murder




I am so never going to get tired of 'Approximately Human'. Hah!

Spike, m'boy

No, for once not my baby boy (although he has been super-adorable of late). I'm talking about his namesake. Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. William the Bloody. Randy Giles. You know the one.

My buddy Kendra Clark blogged about him recently on Trish Milburn's blog (another Whedonite! Yess!). Now, you all know I'm a BTVS fan. And a Spike fan. Hello, I'm a grown woman with three freaking posters of him around my computer. And I'm a Spuffy, viz. a fan of the Spike and Buffy relationship. Buffy fans are continually divided by the eternal Bangel vs Spuffy question (yes, continually: I'm swum in the murky waters of fandom and it's a manic place!), arguing forevermore over which one Buffy truly loved and should have been with. Joss didn't make things any clearer in the end, and quite right too, I think.

For my own part, I believe Buffy loved Angel a great deal. He was her first love, and we all know how intense that can be. I remember the first boy I fell in love with. I thought my heart would never heal, and we never had half the relationship B&A did (I wish!).

But, then there's Spike. I find him more attractive as a character, and not just because he's such a damn hottie. Angel's a damn hottie too. Hoo, baby. But I've never been a van of the tall, dark and brooding type. Gimme a man who makes me laugh any day. Gimme a bad boy. Gimme someone who's not afraid to admit he's love's bitch.

I'm going to state my case here, plain and clear, and say that I think Spike is one of the best characters I've ever seen on TV. He's superbly written and acted, but he's also been allowed to evolve. I'm going to ignore the Angel(the series) season, because I don't feel he was well represented there. We're sticking to BTVS, here. Spike entered that series as a straight villain, and ended it a hero. He went from someone who killed Slayers, to someone who died for one. And yes, there's the thorny issue of Seeing Red, a plot twist James Marsters was reportedly very unhappy with. How can you believe a man loves a woman when he's attempted to rape her?

Oh, how we've moved on from those forced seduction romance novels of the 70s and 80s! And thank God. I always hated those books. What I really hated was that the stupid heroine neverfought back, accepted the brutal way she was being treated, even apparently enjoyed it, and fell in love with the hero anyway! That's not love, that's Stockholm syndrome.

But I will defend the Seeing Red eposide. I think it's an important part of Spike's journey. Let me state here and now that I'd not defending his actions--of course I don't think attempted rape is defensible. But I understand why it had to happen in the story. I believe it belonged there, just like I believe the death of Buffy's mother belonged there, but it doesn't mean I wanted her dead.


Let me explain. In the Buffyverse, when a vampire is created, he loses his soul. Buffy falls in love with Angel because, although he is a vampire, he's had his soul returned. When he loses it again (careless boy), he plots to kill Buffy and end the world, with Spike's help. Spike, however, betrays Angel because he doesn't want the world to end (it contains good things, like Manchester United) and helps Buffy to stop Angel's fiendish plot. When Angel's soul is once more restored, he's understandably upset, and broods a whole lot more.

It's very important to understand the distinction here. Soulless Angel: vicious violent mass murder. Soulless Spike: vicious, violent mass murderer who saves the world half a dozen times; falls in love with a Slayer; protects and befriends her little sister; mourns her mother; and battles to restore his soul so he can be the man she deserves.

This gives us some clue as to Spike's strength of character. As Buffy explains in season two: "You die, and a demon sets up shop in your old house, and it walks, and it talks, and it remembers your life, but it's not you." And yet somehow, flashes of the old Spike come through.


In season five, an eposide of flashbacks shows all the important moments of Spike's life as a vampire. How he killed his first two Slayers, and how he got bitten in the first place. Why he got bitten. You see, Spike used to be known as William the Bloody...because of his bloody awful poetry. Yep, Spike was a poet. A bad one. Composing terrible rhymes to his lady love (and reading them out to his mother), he was terribly hurt by the lovely Cecilia's reaction (ie, scornful hilarity) and rushed outside into the cold Victorian streets, where a woman actually took an interest in him. Unfortunately she made him a vampire. And, doubly unfortunately, she was Drusilla, the novice nun Angel had tortured, raped and driven insane before making her a vampire.


So. William the gentle poet gets taken over by a demon and falls in with a pretty bad lot. He's got all this super strength and shit, but the girl he really wants now--Drusilla--still keeps messing around with that Angel guy. How to impress a gal like her? Why, kill the Slayer! It's such a rush that the next time he runs into a Slayer, he kills her, too. He develops a reputation, and the nickname Spike, derived from the railroad spikes he likes to torture his victims with. Now with Drusilla by his side, and Angel off being soully and broody and out of the picture, Spike's the king of the world.

Then Buffy shows up, and everything goes kerblooey.

Remember that for a hundred years, Spike has been ruled by a demon that whispers in his ear to kill, kill, kill. His girlfriend is a psychopath who likes violence and keeps dead birds in cages. He's pretty far removed from the normal world of romance. So when he falls for Buffy, he has no bloody clue what to do about it. The last time he wanted to make a girl like him, he went around killing Slayers, but that would be rather counterproductive now. The time before that, he wrote poetry, and that didn't end well, either. To add to his problems, Spike gets stuck with a chip in his head that means he can't hurt humans any more. A neutered vampire in love with a Slayer! He might as well die.

And yet, he lives. Taking out his violent urges on demons, taking care not to hurt humans, effects a change in our boy. Trying to please the Slayer falls in naturally with this, to the extent that when Buffy is killed, instead of being glad he's off the hook now, Spike continues to help the Scoobies to fight the forces of evil. He bonds with Buffy's little sister, Dawn, and protects her as much as he can. When Buffy comes a back from the dead, it's Spike who understands. He's clawed his way out of a coffin, too. He's counted the days since she's been gone. He listens when she confesses that she's been pulled out of heaven, and now she's in hell.

Bleak stuff, but Spike has finally found a way to connect with Buffy. He finally feels wanted and needed by her. When she thrashes out her anger, misery and loneliness in a destructive fight with Spike, that leads to sex which literally brings the house down, Spike figures he's finally got what he wanted. Buffy is sleeping with him, confiding in him, trusting him. When she's with him she smiles, jokes, she's happy. He's happy.

And then she tells him it's over. Her ex-boyfriend has come to town and Buffy's so ashamed of her vampire lover. Terrified her other friends will find out. Ashamed of herself for using him. Of course, if she cared nothing for him, she wouldn't mind that she was using him. Spike has never minded. He knows Buffy doesn't love him and probably never will. But it's enough for him, enough for now. Until she takes it away.

And Spike the vicious vampire demon comes roaring back to the surface. He's got to get her back. Got to make her happy again, got to find the happiness she gave him. He doesn't know what to do. He wants to make it stop. Make the feelings stop. He doesn't want to be in love with her any more. He tries to dull the pain, fog her memory by sleeping with another woman, but that all goes horribly wrong, and Buffy's friends all find out she's been shagging a soulless fiend. They hate him. She hates him. It's all gone horribly, horribly wrong. Even Dawn, Spike's greatest supporter, comes to tell him how much he's hurt Buffy.

< He needs to make her love him. Before, when they were having sex, she at least seemed to like him. If he can get her to have sex with him again, maybe she'll like him more. She's saved his life before, she doesn't want to see him dead, she must feel something, right? It's love, she just needs to admit it. Spike's desperate. He'll do anything to get her back, to make the pain go away.

But he can't force her to love him. Not emotionally, and not physically. And when he realises what he almost did, and what he actually did, he's horrified. He nearly raped her. And he really made her hate him completely.

Okay, so let's look at that. He went too far. For too long he's been kicked around, literally, by this woman, he's given up everything for her, changed everything, and she's finally, finally thrown him a bone. Then she takes it away. If he was a dog, you'd call the RSPCA. A starved, neglected creature, desperate for love--you take it in, give it a warm bed, food, affection, and then you kick it in the ribs and call it a Bad Dog when it's done nothing wrong. So the dog snaps, and attacks you. Of course it does. It doesn't understand why it's been treated this way. It only wanted to please you.

So the dog attacks you, and you have it put down. Who knows what would have happened if Spike hadn't got out of town? Certainly, Buffy's friends wanted him dead. Half a season later Giles, the most rational member of the group, plots to kill Spike.


But Spike still isn't defeated. He knows what he's done is terrible. Once again, let me remind you: at this point he still has no soul. Soulless Angel killed remorselessly. He revelled in Buffy's anguish. When he got his soul back, then he was mortified. Spike doesn't have the luxury of a soul, but he still knows he's done something appalling. He has a conscience. He knows he's got to make things better. He's got to give Buffy what she deserves: a good man who loves her and will never hurt her again.

So he nearly kills himself to get his soul back. He does everything in his power to become a better man. Guilt over his past actions drives him to the point of insanity, but he still never stops trying to help Buffy, to atone for the way he treated her. With his brand new shiny soul, Spike knows full well it's not likely a paragon like Buffy can ever love a creature like him, but he's still determined to give her everything he can. He never pressures her for anything again, certainly not sex, but works out what she needs from him--a friend--and gives it to her. And you know what, I believe Buffy does come to love him. I believe he's finally redeemed.


So that's it. That's my defence of a plot point that's divided and embittered many fans. I'd stand by it, if I was Joss Whedon. I believe it's something that needed to happen in that relationship. I believe something had to give, and that the demon infesting Spike's body won for those few awful minutes. But if sweet William hadn't been fighting so damn hard against that demon since the first moment he laid eyes on Buffy, the demon would have squashed him completely, and there would have been no fight. Spike would never have been redeemed.

I'm a Zwinky!

It's just amazing what you can find to procrastinate with these days, isn't it?

Legolas never had to put up with this shit

But then Legolas is a proper archer and wasn't just pissing about on holiday like me. Piece of advice from me to you, I forgot to mention it earlier: when the archery professional tells you that unless you keep your bow arm relaxed, the bowstring will hit your inner arm at 40-110mph, he's not joking.

Just thought I'd pass that on.

Back, two, three, four

...sorry, Steps moment there. Shudder.

Okay, well, I'm back from my mini-holiday. Three loads of laundry later (not mine, but no one else seems capable of it) I've finally remembered about BlogLand. Whoops!

Lots has actually happened this week. A release date for the next Sundown story has been set for December. This story for Changeling Press, Duty and the Beast, features a werewolf who doesn't believe in the paranormal, an elf who can't stop women ripping his clothes off, and some vampire corpses. Sound fun? It is to write.

Also in December I should have a Christmas story for Samhain. This story is so totally brand spanking new that neither it nor its heroine has a name yet. It's set in the Sophie-verse, but before she comes on the scene. More details will follow.

And last but not least, at the urging of my Changeling editor I have another Sundown story lined up. Well, sort of, I only just came up with the idea this weekend. She emailed me and said, "Pretty please can you do another menage?" And because I love her, and all my readers too, it's gonna be a vampire menage. Am I good to you, or what?

Oh! and I nearly forgot. Lacey Savage, another fantastic Changeling author, is featuring my August release, Naked Eyes, in her newsletter. She's even offering a free copy of it. Pop over to her website, or join her Yahoo group for more details. Next month she'll have an interview with me... because you just can't have enough Cat, can you?

Certainly my kittens seem to think so. Since I finally cleared all the crap out of my study they've been exploring (I just typed 'exploding' there, whoops) all over it. Here's my little--or not so little--Spike-alike, helping me with my work.

Off for a few days...

...be back Monday.

Cheerio!